Gossip Girl On Blast

Your one and only source into the scandalous lives of D.C.'s elite.

What you gon' do?

  • Voldemort: What time do you usually get to work in the morning?
  • Me: 9...ish.
  • Voldemort: -_________________-
  • Me: -______________________________-

Chats with fwendz: Fashion porn

  • Me: omaigah NEED that bag
  • Akon: ok well tell me the nasty things you would do for it?
  • Me: well first, i would reach DEEP....
  • Akon: mm hmm
  • Me: into my balenciaga for my wallet, pull out my CC, and swipe that shit HARD
  • Akon: >:(

Chatz with fwendz: On self-improvement

  • Me: i have a project for us
  • Me: we're going to increase our vocabulary!
  • Jasper: cool
  • Me: today's word from dictionary.com is inculcate. i'll attempt to use it in a sentence
  • Me: being more experienced than i am, voldemort takes it upon himself to inculcate me about the intricacies of our job responsibilities
  • Me: now you
  • Jasper: during my skype sex date last night, my date inculcated me all night long
  • Me: fml

Chats with fwendz: Break out the dream dictionary

  • Ned: OMG....i had a crazy dream the other day...you were in it. it was a nightmare.
  • Me: isn't every dream about me... -_____________-
  • Ned: i was trying to kill a big spider with raid. and it wouldnt die
  • Ned: and then it turned into a black cat. and i felt bad for raiding the cat
  • Me: LOL
  • Ned: and then you were there yelling at me
  • Me: thats no dream hunnie
  • Ned: and then you started talking about how great your new paint in your apt was
  • Ned: but it was all dark and purple
  • Ned: and i was like...ummm...yeah...its nice
  • Ned: and then i tried to hook up with you and you said no. the end
  • Me: sounds like a pretty accurate representation of our relationship

My motto is, you thought you were the shit…until I walked into the room.

Tiara, BGC N’Awlins.

GPOY.

Chatz with fwendz: On parents using technology

  • Me: /sigh. my mum doesn't understand how to use gchat
  • Sam: is she technologically inclined?
  • Me: no. but i try to gchat her and explain the concept to her in a language she understands
  • Me: oh herro su su. herro! it me. most honorable eldest daughter. prease. rook nao. i spreak to you. it me!
  • Sam: hmm
  • Me: yeah, she still doesn't get it

Chatz with fwendz: Expecting the worst

  • Me: So, not that it's any of my business, but what happened to Mike's wedding ring? I noticed he wasn't wearing it yesterday.
  • Peter: [Comes closer] You wanna know the truth?
  • Me: Uh oh...
  • Peter: He just got too fat to wear it anymore.
  • Me: LOL